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Doesn’t God want me to be happy? For most people, the ultimate goal in life is to be happy. Most of the time we pursue happiness through money, careers, popularity or relationships. But I want my teens to remember that GOD DOESN’T WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY . . . HE WANTS YOU TO BE HOLY. And although it’s not always mutually exclusive, it’s also NOT the same thing.
A few years ago twenty men in Turkey were taken from their families, lined up, and martyred because they were Christians in a radical Muslim environment. Were they happy? No. Were they holy? Oh, yes!
Christians around the world are facing persecution. Many have lost their homes, jobs, and families. If God wants us as His children to be happy, doesn’t God want them to be happy, too?
Here in our comfortable U.S. of A., especially in the “Bible Belt,” we cannot comprehend the sacrifice Jesus meant when He said, “Deny yourself, take up your cross daily, and follow me” (Matthew 16:24).
To the early Christians, and to many Christians around the world today, living for Christ means persecution or even death. But we have trouble just denying our own desires.
In this series I am sharing with you thirty things I want my teens to remember. I want them to remember my husband and I will always love them, and God’s perfect love is unconditional. Still, loving them doesn’t mean always agreeing or wanting their happiness above all else.
For the Christian, holiness trumps happiness. Every. Single. Time.
“But doesn’t God want me to be happy?” many ask.
Usually we ask this question when we want to justify some sin in our lives or make excuses for a doubtful decision we are about to make. The world says anything is okay as long as it makes you happy. God says, “Be holy, for I am holy” (1 Peter 1:14-16).
So how can we be holy? First, deny yourself.
Deny your selfishness, your sinful desires, & even your good desires that are not a part of God’s plan for your life.
“I know I need to worship with my church family today, but I’m so tired.’
Deny yourself.
“I’m not comfortable sharing my faith or going on a mission trip.”
Deny yourself.
“I should stand up for that kid that is getting bullied, but I’m afraid my friends will turn on me.”
Deny yourself.
“If I give my tithe or help that needy family, I can’t go on that trip I look forward to.”
Deny yourself.
“I know God made sex for marriage, but fulfilling my sexual desires makes me happy.”
Deny yourself.
“I know God created sex/marriage for a man and a woman, but I think I may be gay or at least transgender.”
Deny yourself.
“I’m not happy in my marriage and want out.” (Not the same as an abusive situation.)
Deny yourself.
“I think God may be calling me to missions, but I want a safe job that makes lots of money.”
Deny yourself.
On and on we could go listing things we think will make us happy that will not make us holy.
Deny yourself and choose holiness.
How can we be holy? Second, take up your cross.
In Luke, Jesus reminds us this is something we must do daily (Luke 9:23).
The cross is more than denying yourself. It is crucifying yourself—death to your old life and living a new life in Christ (Galatians 2:20).
It is a daily decision to be a living sacrifice (Romans 12:1).
How can we be holy? Finally, follow Jesus.
Jesus is our example. Love how and who He loved. Choose obedience even to the point of death, but remember that obedience also includes every small detail of our lives (Philippians 2:5-11).
Follow closely and you will live holy.
In Numbers 15, God instructed the sons of Israel to wear blue tassels on their robes as a reminder of all of His commandments “so as to do them and not follow after our own heart and your own eyes . . . so that you may remember to do all My commands and be holy to your God” (Numbers 15:39-40). May the crosses we wear as jewelry not serve as ornaments, but as the same kind of reminders.
God doesn’t want you to be happy, but He doesn’t want you to be unhappy either.
Don’t get me wrong. Jesus wants us to have abundant life. The Christian life is not some dull, hard drudgery of strict rules. It is a loving, vibrant relationship with the only One who can fulfill our deepest needs.
I want my teens to remember that when we choose holiness over happiness, God gives us true joy and contentment that is not based on our circumstances, but on our relationship with Him. Like Paul, we must learn to be content in plenty or want (Philippians 4:11-12).
If my teens can learn now to choose holiness over happiness, God will bless them with joy and peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7). They will also be spared many heartaches that come with the consequences of choosing temporary happiness.
Oh, Father, help us as parents, aunts, uncles, youth workers, and Christian adults to set the example. We want our teens at home and in our youth group to choose holiness, but I know we must do it first. Help us deny ourselves anytime our desires conflict with yours. Forgive us when we fail. Help us repent with a transparency that reminds our teens of your unconditional love. Let your Holy Spirit guide us and them to be holy as You are holy, and to remember we can only be holy through the blood of Jesus.
How do you encourage your teen to choose holiness over happiness?
I’d love to hear from you in the comments.
Remember, you can never be holy by your own effort. Jesus living out His holiness in you gives you rest for your weary soul. See Know Jesus, Share Jesus for how to have a relationship with Jesus.
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